Category Archives: New Testament

ACDC, Juliana Vieira, Keep it Metal!, Matthew, Metallica, Satan Laughing Spreads His Wings

Thunderstruck Tuesday

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I used to think the unforgiveable sin was Metallica’s Black Album. It’s not.

Wherefore I say unto you, All manner of sin and blasphemy shall be forgiven unto men: but the blasphemy against the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men.

And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come. (KJV)

It’s unforgiveable sins. Exit Sandman? Satan laughing spreads his wings.

1 Thessalonians, 2 Timothy, Luke, Matthew

Gratitude

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luke17_17

Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”

When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed.

One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice. He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.

Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?” Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.” (NIV)

A while ago on Facebook I saw this: “The day you stop asking God for help … is the day you start asking for trouble.” It stuck in my head. It’s catchy. But it didn’t seem right at the time and it still doesn’t seem right.

I don’t ask God for help very often. I generally don’t ask for more than is in the Lord’s Prayer.

Give us this day our daily bread.
Forgive us our trespasses (as we forgive those who trespass against us)
Lead us not into temptation.
Deliver us from evil.

Haven’t I asked for enough already? I’ve asked for more than a socialist with a serious entitlement mentality. And what does the Lord’s Prayer, which is how Jesus told us we should pray, ask of me? Nothing.

It seems almost gluttonous to ask for more. I have what I need in abundance. I am blessed. My problems in life, such as they are, are first world problems. We’re supposed to pray, not whine. Jesus makes clear that there is simply no need to ask God for any further assistance.

And when you pray, do not keep on babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

Praise God and give thanks! Show some gratitude! In 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, Paul instructs us to

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

I don’t always thank God, but when I do I feel glad. 🙂

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“The day you stop asking God for help … is the day you start asking for trouble.”

Really? This advice is promulgated by The College of the Open Bible.

Note the reference to scripture. 1 Thessalonians 5:17. I think they spin a lot out of “pray continually,” don’t you? Just now I visited their Facebook page. They call themselves The College of the Open Bible. Where the Bible is the only authority. And they advise Study to show thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed. 2 Timothy 2:15.

I think they need to study a bit harder. The day you stop rightly dividing the word of truth is the day you start making things up. Not judging. Just sayin’.

Humour, Jesus FTW!, John, Logic, Matthew, Personal Identity, Slayer

I am Jesus

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Phew! It’s hard work trying to be *like* Jesus. Even harder work trying to actually *be* Jesus.

But at last! I’ve joined the exclusive Messiah Complex Club. My Christ delusion is complete.

I’m the latest in a long list of poor deluded fools to join the ranks.

But this time is different.

I’m the first person who thinks he’s Jesus who has logical proof to back the claim!

Here’s my argument.

(P1) I am the light of the world. – John 8:12

(P2) You are the light of the world. – Matthew 5:14

Therefore, (C) I am you and you are me.

So there you have it. Deductive proof that I am Jesus and Jesus is me. It’s a valid argument, which is to say, the conclusion follows from the premises. The premises cannot both be true and the conclusion false. And it’s sound. The premises are true. Take my Word for it.

It’s a Rock solid argument against which even the gates of Hell shall not prevail.

as ever: what is to be done?

I can do nothing without myself. I don’t know what you think you can do. (Just kidding. I read your mind. And your email.) But here are some ideas.

(1) Humour me. (Please don’t point out that I don’t have enough hair to be Jesus. That’s just cruel.)

(2) Medicate me. (Just send me the drugs. Contact me privately and I’ll give you the address.)

(3) Appeal to the last vestiges of reason in my poor deluded fool mind. (I’m probably still more rational than you’ve ever been.)

The last one’s your best shot IMOO.

1 Peter, 1 Samuel, Candlemass, Censorship, Matthew, Proverbs, Totalitarianism

Putin is cool

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Putin is cool.

Putin is cool like whitewashed tombs, which outwardly appear beautiful, but within are full of dead people’s bones and all uncleanness. But far be it from me to judge. That’s just the opinion of the deathly cold shiver running down my spine.

Those shades. Look at those shades.

Does Putin wear them to be cool? Or does he wear them to keep out the light of the world so he can continue his uninterrupted walk in darkness? (False dilemma or true? Putin is effortlessly cool, either way.)

How did Putin get to be so cool?

There could be a simple explanation. Russia’s a cold place. Only hell is colder (when it freezes over). Perhaps Putin’s still thawing out after the Cold War. But here’s how I think Putin got to be so cool. The chilling effect of censorship in Russia.

In 2013 Russia ranked 148th out of 179 countries in the Press Freedom Index from Reporters Without Borders.

Putin is cool. The camera doesn’t lie. But the photographic evidence is redundant. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.

Put on your God-goggles. Now what do you see? You see the hidden person of the heart. Do you see the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious, or do you see a crooked heart, a heart that devises wicked plans, which is an abomination to God?

Still got the God-goggles on? Good. It’s mirror time.

Domesticated Primates, Exegesis, Jesus FTW!, John, Logic, Memes, Personal Identity, Philosophy of Mind

He that hath seen me

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3l4kf

For an entertaining exercise, name the third person of the Unholy Trinity.

Who is it? Mini-Me? Fat Bastard? Frau Farbissina? Or … ?

Brian Leftow on “One Person Christology” is Glenn Peoples’ latest blog post.

How can a Chalcedonian Christology avoid ending up with Christ being two people? If the divine logos (the second person of the Trinity) combined with a fully functioning human body and soul (which some people take to be the ingredients of a human being), that is surely two people and not one, right?

Commenter Nathan thinks it would be an entertaining exercise “to try and define Logos and Human as classes, and then try and bring them together to get incarnate Jesus.” He adds, “but ultimately it won’t work.”

Class, superclass, subclass, interface, implementation, instantiation, inheritance—these are all concepts in object-oriented programming (OOP). Object-oriented programming is a programming paradigm that represents things in the real world as objects with attributes (“properties”) and abilities (“methods”). In software development, object-oriented programming is the one true way. But in theology?

The theology question of the day is not

How can God be three persons?

but the closely related

How can the Incarnate Christ be only one?

By implementing the Human interface, that’s how! Not sure if serious or trolling? I’m serious. I think everything is software.

(Incoming! Genetic fallacy! “When you’re a hammer, everything looks like a nail,” you say. “You’re a progr(h)ammer, Richard, so *of course* everything looks like software to you!” Nice try but no chocolate fish. Thales was not a tap.)

I’ll try to elaborate. But there’s a problem. Whereas the procedural paradigm is intuitive, the object-oriented paradigm is counter-intuitive. I started out in the procedural paradigm. Next stop, bitter experience. That’s when I made the paradigm shift. But it wasn’t easy explaining the object-oriented paradigm to myself then, and it won’t be easy explaining it to you now. That’s the problem. But I’ll try to elaborate.

I don’t always determine the meaning of a word by looking at its etymology, but when I do I look at the etymology of the word ‘logic’. The word ‘logic’ derives from the Greek λόγος or Logos, which has no exact translation but means, roughly, “reason, idea, word”. But Logos is the second person of the Trinity. Christ is Logos.

God is the author of the logic of the world, and his son is the expression of this logic.

So says philospher Nicholas F. Gier. Now, what is software but an expression of logic? Think about it.

In the beginning was the Code, and the Code was with God, and the Code was God.

Controversial? Heretical? Or just plain bat-shit crazy? No more so than the Logos Christology of the Gospel of John is any of those things.

A brain (and the body housing it) and a mind (the software running on it) are what constitutes a human person. Christ Incarnate was a human person. He was simultaneously the second person of the Trinity. How come he was not two persons, but just one? Simple. He was running different software. You and I instantiate the class DomesticatedPrimate. Christ Incarnate instantiated the class Logos. Christ is the class Logos. He instantiated himself.

An interface is an abstract class that defines a set of abstract methods. The Human interface is an abstract class that defines what it is to be human in terms of distinctively human attributes and distinctively human abilities. The classes DomesticatedPrimate and Logos have this in common. They both implement the Human interface.

That’s my destructive heresy for today. I’m not teaching it, mind. Just putting it out there.

OOP or Oops!? Be sure to let me know in the comments.

3nf8k

Easy Listening, Luke

Own up. Take a look at yourself.

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I love this scripture.

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everyone else, Jesus told this parable:

“Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed: ‘God, I thank you that I am not like other people—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.’

“But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, ‘God, have mercy on me, a sinner.’

“I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted.” (NIV)

Oh, Lord. It’s hard to be humble.

Deuteronomy, Exegesis, King James Bible, Luke, Mark, Matthew

Thou shalt THINK

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Thinking-With-Clarity1

I noticed something interesting about the Great Commandment.

The first and great commandment is stated in the Gospel of Matthew

Master, which is the great commandment in the law?

Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy MIND.

This is the first and great commandment.

And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. (KJV)

and stated again in the Gospel of Luke

Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy MIND (KJV)

and again in the Gospel of Mark

And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy MIND, and with all thy strength (KJV)

(emphasis mine).

Notice how in each Gospel account you are commanded to love God with all your MIND? That’s odd, because Jesus is supposedly quoting a verse from the Book of Deuteronomy in the Old Testament. But there’s no mention of MIND.

And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thine heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy might. (KJV)

So where did MIND come from? I think it’s a Christian innovation. I think Jesus is commanding us to THINK. What do you THINK?

Do you believe that the Bible (in particular, the KJV) is the inerrant Word of God? Then please explain why Jesus misquotes himself. (But first go away and have a THINK.)

Luke, New Testament

Sweat the small stuff

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This came to mind today…

Martin Luther said, “Sometimes it is necessary to drink a little more, play, jest, or even commit some sin in defiance and contempt of the devil in order not to give him an opportunity to make us scrupulous about trifles.” In other words, “don’t sweat the small stuff.” I think I would pledge my allegiance and take the consequences.

… and this…

Luke 16:10
He who is faithful in a very little thing is faithful also in much; and he who is unrighteous in a very little thing is unrighteous also in much.”

New Testament

Here’s a little something for the ladies

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Ephesians 5:22-24
Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Colossians 3:18
Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.