Category Archives: Beer

Just what the Doctor Ordered. Three Boys Oyster Stout.

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I prepared myself for the worst!
I feared I was walking into a trap laid by My Nemesis, the Dastardly ‘Dr No Goode’.
With great trepidations I wielded my Mauri Brs & Thomson Ltd opener… dreading what horror awaited… yet this was a moral duty I could not shirk…. and I needed to know!
I needed to verify my suspicions that The Diabolical Dr was again up to usual shenanigans and that he had no qualms whose Goode name he ruined in the process!
I admit he had Plotted well when he had chosen to critique Three Boys ‘Oyster’ Stout… his sole Luddite ambition being to enslave Men to By-gone traditions and Backward pseudo-orthodoxy… to suppress any spirit of Endeavour, of Exploration, or innovation, and shackle us to the mundane.
With glee he saw his opportunity!

Read his critique here >>> Ye shall have their carcases in abomination

His verdict was pronounced in that moment…before he had even opened the bottle… and I confess that I was scared!
I had even prepared my counter argument should the Dr have found his mark.
You see the Dr would have everyone believe that I must champion every conceivable deviation from the norm… to maintain my position that such things as Coffee, Chocolate, and even Coconut can have their legitimate place in Beer., and that all that he needs to do is find one abominable brew and drag it before me….like the Pharisees did with the adulterous woman… to see if I would defend the indefensible, or surrender to his Pious legalism.
Evil prevails when Goode men do nothing, and there was no way I could allow Threeboys Brewery to be that victem of such a calculated attack against ‘Yours truely’… and so
I readied myself for an honest endorsement of his cutting Critique, yet would have argued further that in the pursuit of progress (such as powered flight) there were many more failures than successes… yet the Endeavour was still noble, and science was still the winner… even in failure….

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And then I tasted it. 😀
Joy of joys!
My Bravery had once again seen me through the Gauntlet!
What a wonderful Ale Three boys Oyster Stout is!

COMMERCIAL DESCRIPTION:
Doctors once prescribed stout as a revitalising tonic, while brewers enhanced their potency with additional ingredients, like oysters, which had desirable properties of their own. The Three Boys Oyster Stout contains select malt and hops to produce a beer that is rich and complex. And, who knows, our addition of genuine Bluff oysters to this very special brew might be just what the doctor ordered.

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The Author: The Triumph Man Beer Critic Tim Wikiriwhi out at Raglan’s Marlin Cafe and Grill.

I had called the Machiavellian Dr’s bluff oyster and emerged victorious!…at least Three boys emerged victorious! And it is my pleasure to restore their Goode name which was sullied be such a Villain!
His reputation will precede him!
Soon Goode Manly Ales from far and wide will no doubt send him samples in the hope that he will serve out one of his infamous condemnations!
Because a condemnation from such a Fiend will only serve to enhance the reputation of any Brewery.

This surely was one of those times our Naysayer proves one of his Master Niccolo’s own Maxums… “The fool keeps his mouth closed when he should have opened it, and opens his mouth when it should have remained closed..”
He is a poor student.

It is with pleasure that I rank Three boys Oyster stout as of the highest quality, dare I say it… even better than their fine Porter!
Now that Evil has once again been thwarted, I shall enjoy the rest of the bottle, and will not hesitate to purchase more and to recommend it to other Connoisseurs of Fine Dark ales and Stouts!

Yet such a malicious scheemer will not wallow in self pitty for long!
And I must be forever vigilant…

Three Boys Oyster Stout recieved a ’95’ rating here: Rate Beer

Ye shall have their carcases in abomination

3boysoysterstout

Oyster stout? WUT is the world coming to?!

TASTING NOTES

This silky-smooth stout contains select malt and hops to produce a beer that is rich and complex. It contains Bluff oysters and has a slightly smoky flavour.

Contains Bluff oysters?! A “slightly smoky flavour”?! No wonder, this ungodly beer is a burnt offering to Baal! It’s an abomination! It goes directly against God’s word as clearly spelled out in Leviticus 11:9-12.

These shall ye eat of all that are in the waters: whatsoever hath fins and scales in the waters, in the seas, and in the rivers, them shall ye eat.

And all that have not fins and scales in the seas, and in the rivers, of all that move in the waters, and of any living thing which is in the waters, they shall be an abomination unto you:

They shall be even an abomination unto you; ye shall not eat of their flesh, but ye shall have their carcases in abomination.

Whatsoever hath no fins nor scales in the waters, that shall be an abomination unto you.

I have previously warned of the addition of foodstuffs to beer. Beer is water, malt and hops ONLY. Chocolate and coconut were but thin ends of the wedge. And now, alas, it’s come to this.

No doubt, my Dispensationalist co-blogger will tell me that these dietary strictures do not apply in the present Age. I am unmoved.


Crime in Progress!

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Tisk tisk!
Where’s your NZ Standards Approved Safety Helmet HMMMMMMMMM???????

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Yummy!
Renaissance Brewing Company ‘Craftsman’ Chocolate Oatmeal Stout… Marlbough NZ.
(Brewed with Cocoa)
Trophy Winner 2011 Australian International Beer Awards…. Champion Stout.
4.9%

In yo Face! Richard! (You know what I’m talkin bout Homie!)
🙂

Let’s talk rationally about Synthetic Cannabis and how society ought to manage it.

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K2. (I assume that is short for Kronic 2… the synthetic variant of THC in ‘kronic one’ having been banned.) Is this the packaging of this stuff available in New Zealand?
I don’t know! I have never actually seen a packet myself.
What is interesting about this photo is the clear R18 age restriction voluntarily printed on the packs by the distributors, which is a prudent and socially conscientious thing to do, showing that contrary to all the hypocritical claims of ‘drug panic’ merchants who are busy ripping their shirts over the availability of legal highs… the fact is that the distributors have no desire to peddle their wares to children, and that any shop keepers doing so are violating the express conditions of being vendors of this product, and could be/ should be sued by the K2 distributors.
All Legal highs should have such R18 age restrictions on sale and purchase… just like Alcohol.

I have just recently been accepted into a face book group called ‘K2 and other ‘Legal Highs’ in New Zealand. We all need to know the dangers’ (thank’s to my invitation by Richard)
And as recreational drug use and prohibition is an important subject to Libertarian minded people like myself, I hope to present the group with alternative arguments to prohibition… in the interest of society, Justice, and harm minimization.
It will be interesting to see if my input will be recognized as a legitimate contribution to the discussion, or if I… because I am Anti-prohibition… anti- drug phobia… will be labeled ‘a Troll’
And banned.
I certainly hope not!
It is not my intension (today…in this group) to cause trouble, or to be a Gadfly. I enter this group in sincerity believing I have a valid position to put forward and can contribute value to this discussion.

I have blogged about Internet trolling before Here:, , and though I now need to do a follow up blog post confessing my realization of the reality of malicious predators whom do indeed stalk the Net seeking to cause Chaos and disorder, that in no way is this my intension in joining this group.
My intensions are honourable.

Below is my introduction to my Libertarian argument against Prohibition, in favour of an age restricted legal market. (I have embellished it slightly with photos and captions for the sake of this Blogpost)

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This is a very ‘polarizing’ topic… a matter of great paranoia to many….to the extent that they shut their minds to hearing all sides of the debate and demand heavy
handed laws and prohibitions, refusing to appreciate that such an approach has proven to be an absolute failure time and time again, and that the draconian nature of Prohibition is actually far more harmful to our society… esp to the youth who become criminalized and thereby alienated from our society… not for any acts of dishonesty, or violence, but because they have been caught with a small bag of ‘happiness’ in their pocket.
These young people know that they have been unjustly treated, because they know that many of those whom have brought the Law down upon their heads, including the majority of the Police who break down their doors, and ransack their homes, and drag them off to the cells… all drink Booze… beer, wine, and spirits, until they cant even walk!

I would like to present a counter-argument to prohibition as a means of minimizing the harm of drugs upon our society, and discuss why I believe having a legal yet age restricted market for recreational drugs is a far better means of controlling drugs… just as we have with alcohol… and for the very same reasons.
Alcohol prohibition was tried,…and was dismal failure!

Police from tactical team making entry to serve a high-risk drug related search warrant. Street Narcotics Unit.
Drug raid.

Though we still have big social problems with Alcohol, people still need to appreciate that having legal supply of alcohol is still much better than the evils of Prohibition.
For starters it is much easier under a legalized system for people with problems to go and get help, from places like AA, without fear of being prosecuted, or losing their jobs, etc.

This topic is also a lot like xenophobia and the witch craze, in that wild stories grow up all out of proportion to reality, fueling a lynch mob type hysteria.
Anyone familiar with the history of prohibition knows this classic phenomena.
It is a manufactured frenzy, purposely propagated by the prohibitionist lobby and their Populist politicians who think nothing of feigning Piety and social concern, by promising to crush an unpopular minority for the sake of getting elected.

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Corby Schapelle. Imagine for a moment this is your adult child behind bars… not for robbing or harming anyone, but simply because they were found with a drug which was not alcohol.
This is the real ugly face of the injustice of Prohibition… which utterly fails to stop recreational drug use. It merely serves as a disgusting means of inflicting a Nazi-like bigoted hatred upon an unpopular and demonised minority. The Nazis swore their persecution of the ‘Socially deviant Jews’ was completely justified. Vicious bigotry always hides beneath a Cloack of ‘Righteous indignation’.

Though I don’t dispute that drugs (like alcohol and cannabis) ought to be kept away from children, and that adults too need to take care how and when they use such substances, I have little doubt that the fears about the harmful effects synthetic cannabis will prove as groundless as the Nonsense which fueled and maintained Cannabis prohibition.

Cannabis is now being legalized across the globe because of it’s ‘Health benefits’ and medicinal qualities!
It is ironic to understand that for thousand’s of years Cannabis was known and appreciated for it’s manifold beneficial qualities, and that the folly of prohibition of cannabis is itself a *modern phobia*… thankfully this terrible era of prohibition is coming to a close.
It is interesting to consider the fact that if we had already decriminalized Cannabis that we would not be facing the wave of new synthetic substances like K2!
And this fact in itself also reveals why Prohibitions are absurd. Ie because there is a demand for recreational drugs… some innovative people will always figure out an new way to get high, and undoubtedly some these ways will be far more dangerous than cannabis!
Thus Prohibition tends to endanger our youth because it has outlawed safer alternatives.
Below is a blog post I wrote the other day on this subject and I will produce more as this debate unfolds.
I ask members to seriously consider the counter arguments to prohibition if you claim to really have the interests of society at heart, and not be simply driven by a personal bigotry against drug users.

Tim Wikiriwhi
Christian Libertarian.
Hamilton West.

My Pamphlet on BZP… having legal alternatives to Alcohol… Click >>> Historic battles. The Libertarian struggle against Drug Prohibition. Why BZP should have been kept Legal.

Read about how New Prohibitions. How our Police and Government work for Criminal Gangs.

Update: 29-5-13
It appears that after One day, One post, and one reply (in support of Mr G) I have been ‘Fed to the sharks’ by the SOCIALISTS running the facebook page ‘K2 and other ‘Legal Highs’ in New Zealand. We all need to know the dangers’…. which completely vindicates my acustaions that the ‘Anti-everything lobby’ are so fanatically in favour of tyranny, that they will not even consider any alternative arguments to prohibition… in the interest of society, Justice, and harm minimization.
It was interesting to see that indeed my input was not recognized as a legitimate contribution to the discussion, but instead….because I am Anti-prohibition… anti- drug phobia… they chose the low road… the easier path which was to deem me to be ‘a Troll’… and thus….rather than openly debate me….. to simply ban me instead!, and forbid Group members from being able to message me!
*I told ya so!*

Croucher Patriot. American Black Ale.

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About two years ago while I was on the hunt to try different Dark beers and Porter Ales, I came across Croucher Brewing Company’s Patriot, American Black Ale, brewed in Rotorua.
It was exactly the sort of Oddity that I was looking to try.
At nearly $10 for 500mls it was on the pricey side, yet in the name of Beer Science and culture I decided to give it a crack.

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Beer Miester Tim Wikiriwhi at work in the field.

It was very different to any other Black beer I had ever tasted!
Quite shockingly strong on the Hoppiness…something I have never really enjoyed and one of the reasons I prefer Porter ales… yet after a few glasses I was quite enthralled with *this* sort of Hopps!
It actually converted me to the Idea that I should be experimenting more with hopps in my VonTempsky Heroic Ales …homebrew, and though after several ‘fails’…. Batches I will not be repeating, I still cant help but love this Patriot American Black Ale and wish I could figure out how to get some of that magic into my own brews.
I rank this Beer very highly.

Read some more reveiws about it Here:

I have also found out via Croucher’s Face book page that they also Brew an ‘Ethiopian Coffee Stout’ which has gone on tap at Galbraith’s Alehouse Auckland!

As I am a Fan Of Coffee Porters, and Brew my own, I cant wait to get my grubby hands on a few Bottles of this Coffee Stout!
When I do I will report!
Coffee Porters Keep very well.
I am drinking some I brewed about two years ago and still tastes great!
I brew up a very very ‘expresso’ strength jug of Maccona and put a shot glass full in each 750ml bottle before filling with my Porter brew.
That works very well.
See my Home brew Face Book Page for VonTempsky’s heroic Ales Here:

New Prohibitions. How our Police and Government work for Criminal Gangs.

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Just a few of the vested interests in mantaining Hysteria and the Drug war.

What is the definition of Stupidity?
It’s when someone keeps doing the exactly the Same thing over and over and yet expecting different results!

Question: Has Cannabis prohibition succeeded in keeping Pot off the Streets?
Think hard about this….

The Stats actually prove that Prohibition doe’s absolutely *Nothing* to prevent Cannabis use!
The reality is over 50% of Kiwi’s have ignored the prohibitions and smoked Pot, and the rest simply don’t want to!
Thus the Law does *Zero* to halt drug use, and in fact the stats show that prohibition actually makes our schools etc less safe because of the Criminal monopoly… and vendors who have less scruples about who they sell their drugs to than Legitimate regulated traders.

The NZ Herald reports…‘Dairy drug sales to be banned within weeks’

This is simply a repeat of the failed BZP Prohibition which was only a success… for the Gangs and P dealers!
The truth is the BZP Ban removed a cheaper, and safer alternative to P (Meth amphetamine) …an alternative which many hundreds of Drug users were taking advantage of and thus depriving Criminal organisations of millions of Dollars, and helping the recreational drug user to stay out of trouble with the Law and reducing the negative impact of their drug habits upon their Families… esp in relation to Paying the rent, Putting food on the table, and warm clothing in winter… the Illegal market cost of drugs being astronomical… *while demand remains unchanged.*

People Love to do Drugs!

Alcohol is a Drug!… Of Course the A-Dealers (Alcohol) love these prohibitions too… and you wonder why NZ has a Culture of excessive Drinking and drink related violence and crime!

Yet the Populist politicians and Media never mention these sorts of factors… they pretend they don’t exist.
They continue to maintain the lie that such Nanny State Prohibitions ‘make our communities safer’, and yet no one considers the reality that having Legal sales of drugs actually ‘makes our communities safer!’ and that Prohibition not only works to finance criminal Gangs and results in Underworld crimes between rival gangs, Home invasions trying to steel drugs, Murder and violence when deals go bad, etc etc… it also means more young people end up ‘associating’ with criminal Gangs from whom they buy their drugs.

And this refusal to think through all these negative consequences of ‘the war on drugs’ also panders to the willful bigotry and fear of the Sheeple… whom love tyranny… in the name of oppressing their ‘Jews’… ie the unpopular minorities they have demonized.

Then they wonder why their Teenage sons and daughters don’t want anything to do with them!
Then they blame ‘the drugs’ when their adult Children end up in court and jail on Drug offences!
They never consciously admit to themselves that it is their own bigotry which has now alienated them from their Adult Teenage Kids and has destroyed their lives by allowing the state to take away their rights and liberties, to criminalize them and oppress them!
This is how the Stupidity is perpetuated…
Tyranny is far more harmful to our society than the recreational drugs they fail to control.

What the Government ought to do is simply put an R18 restriction on sales of Party pills and synthetic Cannabis, giving the Dairy owners an incentive to only sell such products to adults.
The also should Legalise Cannabis, and BZP, and Nos!

Struth! Auzzy Stout!… Coopers Best Extra Stout.

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Coopers Best extra Stout… having been recommended this Auzzy Stout by an Eternal Vigilante… my team of Highly experienced Analysts and affectionados are putting this Brew through strenuous scientific tests…. using the most Flash Gear.
The result will indisputably… conclusively…. Unquestionably be the most Clinical, Objective, Authorotive, and up to date evaluation of any Beer ever!
Here it comes…. ditditditditditditdit….ditdit… My assistant Borek has just handed me the printout…

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All Righty Then!
Now This Beer comes in a Manly sized 750ml bottle! It gets a big tick for that.
It was on special at the best Beer outlet on either side of the Mighty Waikato…West Hamilton’s New World Te Rapa… for less than $6, normally about $6.50 which is still ‘Crickey Dick’ Cheep…. esp for a 6.3% Brew! …another two big ticks there!
And as for the taste???? ???? ????
Not Bad! Surprisingly Drinkable!
It’s not as nice as the Renaissance Elemental Porter I had the other night, or as nice as the Pitch Black Stout on Tap at the House Bar on Hood st Hamilton, or as nice as Geeks Cocoanut Porter ale, or as nice as a Boundary Rd’s Chocolate Porter… but still Its very Good.

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What is very nice is the kick! 😀

Tie Me Kangaroo down Sport! Coopers Best Extra Stout Redeems Auzzy piss somewhat!
At that Price… It’s Bloody Good, and I am Stoked that I gave it a try!
It’s a winner.
Chur Bro! (Mark) 😀

Beer Schoolin Richard G …. Porter Ale is King!

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What a fine drop this is!!!!
6% too! 😀
Take note Richard G of the statement below!
esp… “Beer of Choice”…. “a supprising effective accompaniment for Dark chocolate, coffee,…”

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Elemental is our most awarded beer, it has won gold medals in Australia and New Zealand and for a time it was rated New Zealand’s top beer, no mean feat for a porter of moderate alcohol and a balanced finish.

Originally the beer of choice for workers in London’s produce markets, the beer was a mixture of the previous nights slops that the “porters” would drink when they clocked off at dawn. Porter is also Andy’s all time favourite beer style. Brewed in the modern ‘robust’ style, Elemental Porter is a rich, full bodied brew with plenty of dry, dark chocolate and roasty malt flavours which gradually give way to a cleansing hop-driven finish.

Not intuitively thought of as as a food beer it is a surprisingly effective accompaniment for:

•Dark chocolate
•Coffee or berry-based desserts
•Blue cheese
•Barbecued meats
And although historically it was a sunrise beer, we think nowadays it is probably more suited to an be served after dinner with desserts and cheese, although if you want to drink it at day break, we’re not going to stop you.

Cheers!

Andy and Brian

^^^^quote is from here: http://www.renaissancebrewing.co.nz/content/elemental-porter-ale-craft-beer.html

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Grunge Miester Tim Wikiriwhi Queenstown Motorcamp. New Years Day 1999.
That’s a Montieths Black… Porter Ale! …. actually may be a Black Mac. 🙂
My Fav beer for 20 odd years has been Waikato Draught, yet that was notoriously hard to get on the Mainland, and so on that ‘mission’ I was buyin up Montieths Black (you can get it by the Jug down there!) and also swillin Black Macs.
That bottle looks more like a Mac one than a Montieths.
And for the record both Black Montieths and Black Macs are bloody good ales!
Despite being bought out by Big Brewers…
I present that quote from Renaissance Brewing as evidence against previous remarks by my fellow blogger… re My endorsement of both Porter Ale and in particular Boundary Road Chocolate Porter Ale.

See Here: Stealth RTDs

…and Here (and the Comments!) New Zealand Beer War. Geek Coconut Porter.

New Zealand Beer War. Geek Coconut Porter.

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It’s an indisputable fact that Real Kiwi Jokers Drink Porter Ale… not Lager!
Lager is Auzzie Piss.
Ok for chicks…like that Mexican urine they drink with a slice of lemon.
New Zealand is now in the violent throws of a Beer Revolution.
Is Geek Coconut Porter NZ’s finest brew?
It could well be.
Now I like Boundary Road Chocolate Porter, esp when I can get it for $13.00 rather than $18.00 per six pack. It tastes mighty fine yet it’s only 4.5%.
Geek Coconut Porter on the otherhand costs $5.oo per stubby yet is 6%… and tastes Damn fine too!!!
This is a tuff call.
Both taste great.
It’s a play off between Volume vs Bang.

Read about Geek Coconut Porter here:

If your Piss shop does not stock it… GO SOMEWHERE ELSE! … or ask them to get some.

P.S I suggest readers pay little heed of what my Fellow Blogger Richard writes on such lofty issues as Beer. His doctorate in Philosophy is a woefully insufficent credential.
(Hume himself is rolling in his grave!)
Richard should stick to Mycology. (Esp at this time of the year!)

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I on the otherhand was born in Tokoroa, Am Founder and Master Brewer @ VonTempsky Heroic Ales, and I ride a Triumph.
😀
Tim Wikiriwhi.

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VonTempsky Heroic Ales Here:

Stealth RTDs

stealth_rtdsI tried Boundary Road Brewery’s Sticky Wicket manuka honey lager … it tastes like fizzy manuka honey.

I tried Boundary Road Brewery’s Chocolate Moose chocolate porter … it tastes like fizzy chocolate syrup.

These are not craft beers for the discerning adult palate, they’re alcoholic soft drinks for children. Notwithstanding that Boundary Road Brewery does make some half-decent beers—I already rated the Bouncing Czech pilsener, and the Mumbo Jumbo IPA is currently my preferred beer in its price range—I’m disappointed.

I suppose that if beer-flavoured lemonade is your thing, you can’t go past the Lawn Ranger lemon and lime infused lager, but otherwise I wish BRB would stick to making actual beer.